“But I Played All My Cards Right!” – True Sentiments of a soon-to-be Graduate

But I have 5 internships under my belt and tons of leadership experience and graduated Summa Cum Laude….

None of that guarantees you a job after college. I think the scariest thing about knowing that you are graduating in just a few months is the thought that while you have prepared for this moment for the past 4,5 or even 6 years, it might still not be enough. The more people I tell that I have only 3 months left until I receive my Master’s Degree, the more I hear the following responses: “Lucky!” “Oh, you must be so happy!” “That’s soooo exciting!!!” And maybe I am lucky and maybe I should be happy and maybe this is a very exciting time in my life, but it is very hard to feel that way when I know that the pressures and realities of real life and “adulthood” are lurking around the corner. It feels like as soon as I walk across that stage 100 bills are going to be thrown my way and the fun part of my life will be a thing of the past! The most exciting time of my life has been turned into the most stressful and worrisome few months I have ever experienced in all 22 years of living.

I currently have an internship that I love! If I could turn this internship into an actual job, I would be so thrilled. I have yet to call in sick, I show up every day on time and I make sure that no matter what is going on in my personal life, I always wear a smile on my face. This is the last of 5 internships that I have held during my time as a student. 3 years back I would have said to myself “5 internships? And good grades? Sam, you’re destined to land the job of your dreams!” But here I am with 90 days (give or take) until graduation and I still cannot give you straight answers as to where I will work, where I will live or how I will start to pay my student loans! Every day when I walk into my internship I feel as though I am temporarily living the life I really want. I have access to so many connections and I am in the exact field I want to be in, but I know I have to give it all up in a few months. So currently I am in a position in life where I have no choice but to throw my hands in the air and say “I don’t know” as an answer to the questions of my parents and other family members. The truth is that it is too early to start applying for jobs and whatever internships I have done up to this point is all I can do. I, as well as everyone else in my predicament, really need to let life take its toll and trust that what is meant to be, will be. Not that this thought eases my anxiety, or keeps me from compulsively scrambling through job search websites, but it is the truth. For once in my life, I am not 100% in control. I don’t like this.

I’ve played all my cards right…now will it get me to where I want to be?

 

 

 

 

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2 Comments Add yours

  1. hernandezmonica says:

    5 internships under your belt? That’s amazing! Congratulations on your success. I am more than positive that you will find a job because you have a lot of experience. It’s incredible what you have achieved in your short life. Just know this is just the beginning of great and exciting things!

    1. Samantha says:

      Thank you! I’ve been searching so we shall see what happens

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